“You’re not supposed to say that, I think.”
“Why not?”
“You’re only supposed to talk about stuff in the story.”
“Well, a dotted line below the word returded is in the story. Tommy, if you will?”
Tommy then used his holographic laser to show Retro. Then he left it permanently there, where it floated amazingly.
Retro did a serious facepalm. The chimp chattered next to him.
“Ah, be quiet.” Retro grumbled, slapping the daft chimp’s face. Bo’s face reddened in anger at the injustice towards his fellow monkey. He started his boxer shuffle. The chattering chimp did a boxer shuffle too. Sweat poured down their faces. Their armpits grew soggy. They breathed heavily. Then, Bo leaped out and did a swirling punch at the monkey. The monkey collapsed on the ground, eyes shut. There was a big black, grapefruit-size mark on the chimp’s eye. The monkey groaned and chittered. He held his eye. Then he showed it to Bo and chittered something.
“Ooh, that looks bad,” said Bo. “I’m really quite sorry.” He picked up the eye from the chimp’s hand and washed it in a stream that came from nowhere. Then he shoved it back in the chimp’s socket. The chimp grinned and chittered and jumped.
Retro rolled his eyes again. One moldy eye dropped out, tendons snapping and flapping. Veins hung.
“Ugh, not again,” he grumbled, picking it up, and stuffed it back in his own socket, torn tendons and all. He cupped his hands around his mouth and breathed a breath.
“HOOOO-WEE!” he exclaimed. “Smells like Gorgonzola cheese! How cheesy!”
While all this hygiene checking was going on, Retro didn’t notice that all his captives were gone. Even the smelly, yelly, orange chimp. And even Zoe.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Birds flew out of trees, screeching at the loud yell.
Meanwhile, Bo, Zoe (who had already come back to life) and the others snickered from under their bush. Let me rephrase that - the huge bush.
“That was hilarious! Gorgonzola cheese! Come on la dey!”
“Sure was cheesy!” said Johnny Boy.
Retro growled.
“Come back here! Don’t make me angry! You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry!” With that, he clenched his muscles and roared to the sky. The little wobbly thing at the back of his throat wiggled in fright.
“Let’s split up,” Bo whispered, “then it will be harder for him to find all of us.”
So they all went their own ways. Faysaham and Mahasyaf hid in rabbit holes (big ones) [lol], Zoe, Johnny Boy and Bo scurried up trees, and Tommy stood clearly in a middle of a grassy clearing. Invisible of course. Retro gave up and stomped away to his smelly friends. Seeing this, Bo and Zoe and Tommy suddenly had the same idea.
“We plan, to save the world!” They all yelled, pumping their fists in the air.
The others stared strangely, but the three weirdos acted as if they hadn’t done anything out of the ordinary. They all suddenly realized something.
“Hey! Why is everything so big? I mean, big bushes, big rabbit holes...”
Bo looked grave.
Tommy looked solemn.
Zoe looked normal.
Johnny Boy looked surprised.
Faysaham and Mahasyaf were hugging each other in fright.
“There is only one explanation,” said Bo.
“Yes. One explanation,” said Tommy.
“We have shrunk,” Zoe said normally.
Faysaham and Mahasyaf let out little screams like girls.
Johnny Boy was shocked.
“But how?” he asked.
Tommy again connected to his speedy 4G network and looked at the Hakrin water page. There he saw, at the bottom of the page.
UPDATE: After some research today, our researchers have also found out that Hakrin water has another strange effect on non-humans. Research shows that it shrinks all non humans down to one-fourth of their size.
**A more recent update shows that it has even stranger effects on aliens. They are already smaller than usual, so instead of being shrunk, they morph into human body part shapes. Some Uranians have been known to transform into bladder shapes.
He slapped his left forehead (remember how a heart is shaped, seeing how Tommy is morphed) and read it aloud to the others. They too, slapped their normal foreheads.
“Tommy, you look disgusting,” Zoe said, “and when you slapped your left forehead, the dent stayed.”
“Lol,” said Bo boredly.
“Oh my God!” said Faysaham, just understanding what Tommy had told them.
“You’re so late, Faysaham. Your new name is The Late Faysaham. We’ll call you that from now on. Got that, Narry?” said Bo kindly.
Yes, Bo. Whatever.
The Late Faysaham, TLF for short, pouted in the non-existent corner.
“B-b-b-but-” TLF blubbered sadly.
“No, no it’s just plain TOO LATE. Subject’s out.” said Bo, Zoe, and Tommy in unison.
“You guys are extremely mean and close minded. Literally. You always all say the same thing at the same time.” said Mahasyaf.
“Defendin’ yo’ bro, huh?” they said in unison again. “Well, it ain’t our fault. It’s the narrator’s.”
Mahasyaf snorted. Green snot spurted out of his nose. “Ow!” Mahasyaf said. “My nose hurts.”
“Are you oka-” TLF started.
“Your snot is so green, Mahasyaf. From now on, we’ll call you the Green Mahasyaf. Got that, Narry?” said Bo kindly.
Yes, Bo. Whatever.
Well, the Green Mahasyaf, Grema for short, started protesting.
”Hey, Gramma, where are yo’ wrinkles?” asked Bo.
Grema pouted in the non-existent corner.
TLF cried. “Why do WE have to have names like these?” he wailed.
“You deserve it, that’s why,” said Tommy, trying to be prim with his hands clasped near his morphed abdomen as he couldn’t really reach it because his legs were all short and his torso was all long..
“I believe I must fix this morphedness,” said Tommy. He then grabbed the bottom of his huge torso and pulled it up, hard. His veins bulged. His face turned red. His huge torso slid to the top of his body, and his small torso went down. Now I am Muscle Man! (They always have wide tops. )
Now Tommy’s body was fixed.
“Now, about these fingers and arms of mine.” He mashed his fingers against a wall until they shortened.
“Hey, where’d a wall come from?” asked Zoe. “We’re in the jungle.”
I took it away, Zoe. My imagination put it there.
“Hmph,” said Zoe. “Well, then, don’t listen to your ‘imagination’ !”
How else will the story go on?
“Hmm....however we characters want it to!”
A very bad choice indeed. But that is how it is supposed to go according to the Head. How do you want the story to proceed?
Zoe cleared her throat and said, “Tommy rammed his hand, fingers outstretched, into a tree.”
How very unoriginal Zoe.
Anyways. Go on. SPEAK.
Zoe stared in dismay at the narrator. “I can’t narrate the whole story!”
NO. You must speak. I will narrate as always.
“Huh?”
ENOUGH ARGUMENTS WITH ME.
Tommy grinned proudly as he admired himself in a pool that came out of nowhere.
“Beautifully blue and Martian-shaped!” he exclaimed, holding out a dainty hand. “But my head is still shaped like a heart and my legs are still stubby. Oh, and I still have weird tubes poking out from the sides of my head.”
Tommy then got hold of his right forehead, and squeezed it. His veins bulged. His face turned red. His wimpy muscles strained. BLOOP! His left forehead disappeared! But Tommy’s right forehead felt very heavy. His head sagged. He felt his right forehead. It was HUGE! Lumps hung from it.
“Look what you did Narry!!!!” Tommy bellowed slapping Narry.
Ow, Tommy, you tilted my words.
Bo grabbed Tommy’s leg stubs and pulled them until they stretched. Then he shaped the end of them into the normal boot shape of Tommy’s feet. Tommy grinned even more proudly.
Tommy stood between two trees and whammed the right side of his head into the tree on his right, and did the same with his left. The tubes sank into Tommy’s head. Tommy grinned the proudest. His face shone with oil and sweat.
“I did it all by myself!” he yelled to the jungle. Retro heard him and growled. But alas, he still could not find them. He had got himself stuck in his own dungeon. He roared again and bashed his behiney fiercely. There was a CRACK, and all was lost.
***
The chattering monkey chattered something. Bo, being a monkey too, understood. “He said he knows about a hidden monkey friend. He’s a chimp, too. He could be the one we’re looking for!”
“Oh! Great!” said Zoe. “Why does he only chatter, though? Why doesn’t he, like... you know... talk?”
“Because he wouldn’t be himself if he could talk. His name is Chattering Monkey,” Bo answered.
Bo then turned to the chimp and asked, “So where is this chimp?”
Chattering Monkey chattered something, then ran away. “Hey, Chattering Monkey! Slow down! Don’t leave us!” Bo yelled in dismay. He ran after Chattering Monkey. “He said to follow him. Come on!” Bo yelled to the others.
The others sprinted after him.
When they reached Bo and Chattering Monkey, they found themselves at what seemed like a secret place. There was a circle of trees surrounding a patch of dirt with a pattern of rocks on top. Chattering Monkey motioned the others over. Then he squeezed in through the tree circle. He chattered something.
“He said to come in,” said Bo. So the others squeezed in too - except Grema, who was kind of big, even though he was shrunken. He finally got in.
“So...is the chimp trapped under this dirt?” asked Bo. Chattering Monkey nodded. Then he chattered something.
Bo said, “He said we have to arrange the rocks on top in a certain way. It’s like a code. It will unlock the trap and we can get the chimp out.”
“Well, how should they be arranged?” asked Zoe.
“Use your brain, ding dong,” Bo said. “All we have to do, is look at the patterns on each rock, and arrange them into some kind of shape. Or else ask Tommy, the know-it-all. But we don’t need that kid right now.”
Tommy swelled in offense, but Bo continued on. “See, I’m real good at hard puzzles, so I should know what to do. First of all, we’ve got to get all the rocks lined up neatly. Then we may begin.” Bo efficiently arranged all the rocks scratch-up, (each rock had a dark scratch in it) then inspected them. Then he looked closely. He scratched his head.
“None of these scratches meet each other!” he exclaimed. “It seems that we need you, Tommy.”
Tommy, though still sulking, quickly connected to his 4G connection and searched up ‘weird puzzle rocks’. He got a result.
Weird Puzzle Rocks
One of the hardest puzzles in the world, Weird Puzzle Rocks is a puzzle that has 5 different pieces that come in 5 different kinds of scratches, from very deep, D1, to shallow, D6. The other difficult thing about Weird Puzzle Rocks is that they are complete squares, with no little knobs to connect them. When puzzle is finished, it makes a symbol in an unknown language that most of our astrologers believe it says ‘OPEN’. Puzzle Rocks are very rarely found, but when they are, there is always danger. A more recent study shows that once you get into a Weird Puzzle Rock zone, you are locked in until you complete the puzzle or survive the danger that will come after not completing the puzzle within around 20 minutes.
“Oh my God!” said Tommy, squeezing his cheeks in surprise. To his mighty surprise, his cheeks morphed! He then took hold of his index finger with his left hand, then pulled. Just as he was expecting, it stretched! The other animals looked in amazement. Tommy then had an idea. He went to one of the trees on the side, and rammed his fingers against the tree until they were gone. Then, using his other hand, he carefully pinched the end of his hand and stretched it making it look rather like a large shovel. Using his mind, he hardened his now morphable body. He plunged his shovel hand into the dirt. He dug and dug, until he uncovered a gleaming steel block, 7 feet deep. “Guys, look at this,” he said.
They all peered into the hole.
“Hey! There’s a possibility that the chimp might be down there!” exclaimed TLF dumbly.
The others stared at him with half eyes. “Duhhhh.”
TLF stared back at them in confusion. “Well, amn’t I right?” he asked in pure dismay.
“No, you never are. And ‘amn’t’ isn’t a word. Tommy, if you will?” said Zoe and Bo in unison.
Tommy used his holographic laser to show TLF. The word floated amazingly.
TLF stared up at the word in dismay. “Yeah, yeah, what-evah, bro,” he said, face reddening.
Tommy rolled his eyes and continued shoveling. Or should I say digging. He finally made the hole big enough for them all to fit in.
“Okay, fatties, hop in!” he said.
Then, when everyone hopped in, he morphed his hand into a hammer. Then, with his old powers, he lit up his hammer hand with fire and started smashing the iron cage with his burning hammer. The iron, melted and dented, finally made a hole big enough for them to enter. But before they could go inside, two big animals leaped out at them. Quick as the wind, Tommy morphed both of his hands into swords, materialized himself to metal, and slashed at the two animals. They screamed in pain and ran out into the clearing. Then, there was a rumble. It has been only 20 minutes since they entered the weird puzzle rock zone, and the danger was here. Suddenly, they were all surrounded by a bright white light. They all squeezed their eyes shut in pain. Then, the whole place started to shake. A hairy tentacle shot out of the dirt wall, wiggling nastily.
Everybody carefully opened their eyes. It was still bright, but in the brightness, they could make out the nasty tentacle. Then, the bright white light darkened to a sickly, nasty blue-green. Everybody opened their eyes fully, and gazed at the light. They barfed immediately.
“Eww!! Ugly!! I thought it was bright and white!!!” Everyone squealed like girls, eyes shut again. Then their eyes popped open again and they gazed lovingly into each other’s eyes. And then.....nastiness...happened. Narry could not control himself. He burst out laughing.
Head: NARRY!!! You know it is against the rules of narrating to put nastiness in this story and LIE!!! Rewrite! I will now cross it out.
So now Narry, chastised, narrated again.
...Everybody popped open their eyes again and squinted against the hideous light.
“What’s up with this light, man?” TLF asked, uglily.
“I don’t know, man.” Tommy answered, “Lemme check ma 4G network again, man.”
“WoMan...” replied TLF.
Tommy did a quick search on lights.
Ultra-Violet (C) Light
There are three types of UV rays, UVA, UVB, and UVC. Although UV light is invisible to humans, it is very dangerous to be exposed to it, especially UVC. In some fictitious jungles, UVC is known to be a sickly, nasty, blue-green color. Victims of UVC light have experienced skin redness and eye irritation. The most dangerous thing about this light is that it highly energetic and can burn skin.
Tommy suddenly felt nauseous. He felt his skin darken.
“Uh...hey man, what’s wrong with you, man?” TLF asked.
Tommy weakly put out a holograph showing the results he had just found.
After reading it all, everybody’s mouths opened wide into a big ‘O’.
Ultra-Violet (C) Light
There are three types of UV rays, UVA, UVB, and UVC. Although UV light is invisible to humans, it is very dangerous to be exposed to it, especially UVC. In some fictitious jungles, UVC is known to be a sickly, nasty, blue-green color. Victims of UVC light have experienced skin redness and eye irritation. The most dangerous thing about this light is that it’s highly energetic and can burn skin.
“OH MY GOD!” they all screamed.
Tommy searched again on his network and found another fact about lights.
Loud Sounds
If a victim of any of these lights makes a very loud sound, such as screaming, things are expected to happen. Small, winged animals might make an attack, and there is a high probability of a lightning bolt war or hairy tentacle tickling-to-death.
“Uh oh,” the creatures all whispered meekly.
But it was too late.
Bats streamed out from every corner of the hole as lightning flashed and tentacles snaked out from the ground wrapping themselves around the little group. Suddenly, the whole hole smelled of burning skin. Everybody glanced at each other and cried while laughing (tentacle tickling). As their skin burned to crisps, the tentacles tickled and peeled off the crisps until fresh new skin showed beneath. As the fresh skin was exposed, it too, started to burn. It was revolting.
“This is like HELL!” Grema managed to choke out from his uncontrollable laughter.
Suddenly, the Head butted in.
Head: Narry, you should stop calling those cheetahs awful names. Even though they deserve it, it’s still mean. So please, from now on it’s Faysaham and Mahasyaf. If that’s too hard for your wimpy self to do, then-
“I second that!” Grema and TLF yelled.
Head: Narry...
Narry: ...Excuse me; ...Mahasyaf and Faysaham yelled.
Head: Very good. Continue.
As skin burned, everyone screamed and laughed awfully. Soon, it was increased to a cackle and a wail, and then, it was increased to evil laughter and sad bellowing. The six creatures had become evil from the constant punishment.
“How long does this laaaast?!” Johnny Boy chuckled.
Suddenly, everything stopped. The hairy tentacles sucked back into the dirt wall. The bats flew away, squeaking. The lightning bolts jumped away. The sickly, green-blue light brightened to a light blue. A voice boomed from within the depths of the dirt walls.
“YOU HAVE SURVIVED THE DANGER. YOU MAY NOW PROCEED INTO THE BLUE DOOR ON YOUR RIGHT. ”
Then there was a rumble, and a blue door suddenly appeared on the creatures’ right. The door was robin’s egg blue in color, like Zoe’s eyes, and it was bordered with glitter. Embedded in the door was a shiny, blue metal frog.
Bo had a daft look on his face. Then he stared down at his skin. “AAAAAAUGHH!” he screamed, chokingly. His skin was black, and skin was peeling off, uncovering flesh and protruding bones.
Everybody else looked at their skin too, and screamed. “Eeekh!”
“Let’s take a peek in that blue door...muahahahaaa,” said Zoe evilly. (She was still evil from the constant punishment.)
Johnny Boy slithered over to the door, followed by the others, who were kind of drunk.
Zoe opened the door with a blackened, burnt paw - and a gust of cold, blue dry ice swept over them. It covered them for five minutes and then it faded away.
Everybody stared at themselves. Instead of blackened, burnt skin and protruding bones, there was a replacement of new skin, unblackened. No protruding bones. Everybody was no longer evil.
“Ooh! That was great!” exclaimed Zoe, rubbing her arm. There was a ripping sound when the skin peeled off the flesh. Zoe’s eyes opened wide, but Bo ignored her.
“Well, let’s go inside this door!” Bo said. He strutted proudly into the room. He saw hundreds of boxes - steel boxes. In the corner, beyond all the shelves and boxes, was an arched door. Bo spotted one steel box that shook crazily on a blue shelf. Angry chitters were heard from inside.
“It’s the chimp!” Bo said. “The trapped chimp!”
